Travelin' Jack

I'll be travelin' a wee bit to get to one cute ass dork!
But seeing his face when he gets that.....!
Save me a seat Amtrak.

Believe

This clip is from the movie, Run Lola Run. This song is how I start my work out on that bastard cross trainer. When I'm on that cross trainer. I am Lola. I am running. I wish I was a hunter.

The begining part to this song is in German. In English it translates to:

Lola (asks Mani)

What would you do if I died?

I wouldn't let you die.

Being specific

Reading a book about creative visualization I decided to invent some of my own. He does write in his book to keep your visualizations private. Your loved ones may mock you or fear that you'll leave them behind. Ok. So I created some. And they keep getting more detailed. When I go for walks, I get in these visualizations. I sit in the rooms I created and admire things I've made. I keep seeing a small cottage in the woods. It has pine trees around, and possibly by a brook or stream (damn you Thomas Kinkade, you painter of light!) I posted a blog in October that had this cute cottage pictured. I keep seeing either the light above at the front entrance or something like this second one. It shifts. I do see a specific date and I'm outside this house or something close. I'm so overwhelmed I can't stop crying with happiness. The door opens and someone comes out to see why I won't come in and why I'm crying. I guess I'll have to wait and see.

Bed of love

Bed of love
Originally uploaded by Debora Drower.

I'm in a hospital. Hooked to a host of beeping machines. I have IV tubes snaking all over me. I'm barely a person lost in all this machinery. The doctor comes in looking grave. He resembles a gruff friend of mine and he says, "Drower, either you fight this or it wins, it's your choice." I lay back on the pillow with barely any strength and wish it would all end. It could end with me surviving, getting stronger. Or I could just float away and never look back. Float away and never look back.

Just playing the record

"On New Year's Eve, 1977, we were invited to meet with Grace Jones at Studio 5 but she didn't leave our name at the door and the doorman wouldn't let us in. Studio 54 was that kind of place. Our music might be playing inside, but the place was packed for New Year's Eve and this was early in our career. Anyway, my apartment happened to be one block away, so Bernard and I went there to sort of quell our sorrows. We grabbed a couple of bottles of champagne from the corner liquor store and then went back to my place, plugged in our instruments and started jamming."

"And since we were feeling bad, we played music to make us feel good. We started jamming on the now-famous riff — It was just something that happened.So I incorporated a little linear lick and we started singing, 'f**k off!' [Repeats the lick.] 'Aaaaahh, fuck off!'

"So 'Fuck Off' was a protest song, and we actually thought it was pretty good — 'Aaaaahh, f**k off!' It had a vibe. I was thinking 'This could be the anthem of everybody who gets cut off on the street by a cab driver or any kids who want to say this to their parents.' You know, 'Hey, I wasn't saying it, man! I was just playing the record.'"

A quiz to figure out your Dork Quotient...

A dork is:
1. Slang A stupid, inept, or foolish person
2. Vulgar Slang - The penis.

What is your dork quotient...
1. Are you slow at getting jokes?
a) Nah, I usually get 'em right away.
b) Most of the time. No one will explain them to me anymore.
c) Actually, I don't think most jokes are very funny.

2. When you do get them, do you laugh strangely?
a) No.
b) Yeah.
c) I don't laugh.

3. Have you ever tripped over a smooth sidewalk?
a) Once or twice.
b) If I'm not paying attention.
c) No. I never look up from the sidewalk.

4. ...While you were making eye contact with someone attractive?
a) No, I try not to be a dumbass.
b) Rather often, actually.
c) Eye contact?

5. What do your friends think of you?
a) That I'm a pretty cool person.
b) That I'm weird, but in a good way.
c) Friends?

6. Does your clothing match right now?
a) Of course.
b) Kind of.
c) My computer doesn't care, so why should I?

7. Do you go out on Friday and Saturday nights?
a) Almost always.
b) Sometimes.
c) No, the library closes at 5.

8. Can you do dialogue along with the Holy Grail?
a) The what?
b) Can and do.
c) I don't watch movies.

9. Who do you most closely identify with?
a) Kermit.
b) Gonzo.
c) Scooter.

10. How do you react if someone refers to you as 'strange'?
a) I'm a little insulted.
b) I take it as a compliment.
c) I ignore them and resume work.

11. Do you have a web page?
a) No.
b) Yes.
c) No, I have real work to do.

12. How do you react when you meet somebody's kids?
a) I pat them on the head and say hi.
b) We'll usually engage in an ugly-face contest.
c) I avoid children.


Scoring...
Mostly A's
Mostly B's
Mostly C's

Fergalicious

Here's me and the Duchess of York. My mom thinks we look like sisters. She's certain she could prove we actually are related. It's a stretch. By that same stretch, I could related to the other Fergie. She's Fergalicious and then by association so am I.

Knotty pinings

My grandma had a knotty pine basement like this. It's so expensive to try to recreate. I priced it out. I'd need the wood slide and Grandpa's billards table. And that odd heater that had flames. And the scary room with the boiler and washer (with a window) and dryer. Somewhere there are pictures of that place on Virginia.
You can visit the site where this photo is from and see their extensive collection of retro ad stuff. As good as a real knotty pine basement.

Somewhere Out There..

Someone's thinking of me and loving me tonight.

I found this video and even though the opening credits go on - it's really sweet. It's dedicated to you, the man of my dreams. Wherever you may be.

Swiss Colony memories

Mmmm...
Originally uploaded by mirthblaster36.

As a fat kid, the Swiss Colony catalog was crack for me. Oh god. All the gorgeous shots of the food. The best part, the hiding in the bathroom with the faucets going, was the candy part. Honest to god. I would get so fucking hot looking at the candy. Or did it all just boil down to the that Disneyesque logo. Either way, I totally get you Cartman, when you sing about the Swiss Colony Beef Log. (Scroll down and it's Windows Media Player only - sorry Mac users)

I have even driven past it in Monroe, Wis. Rock on Swiss Colony.

Mother tries to comfort me;
She says "Here, Son, have some eggnog."
I fucking hate eggnog, seriously.

The Littlest Snowman

The Littlest Snowman
Originally uploaded by Neato Coolville.

I wish we had used this image at Big Bell Ice Cream for our holiday greeting card. It's too late. This so freakin' rocks.

Tear down the messs

I was at the Walker Art Center a few weeks ago to see the British Advertising Awards. We had a few minutes to spare so we were walking around. There's this "Heart of Darkness" exhibit that was hideous. It's crap strewn around and odd stains on furniture. It was so off-putting, we quickly left. A yucky mess.


Rich chocolate mess
Originally uploaded by rcvernors.

My favorite way to describe something is to call it a rich chocolately mess. It sounds tasty. Cute kid.


Tear down
Originally uploaded by gen gibson.

Talking to Gigi today, I was describing a friend. I first said he was a mess (henceforth the images of various messes) but I retracted that and said he was worse than that, he was a complete tear-down. I just made it up on the spot. Yup, a complete and total tear down.

You probably think this song is about you

Sweetie, they ARE all about you!
Don't read too much into it.

Wheel Of Fortune

Will the arrow point my way
Will this be my day?

Ain't No Other Man

I shouldn't admit it to you

Even though you don't know

Or won't tell

There ain't no other man

It's true

Ain't no other man

But you

Bitch

bitch pin
Originally uploaded by crazycatladymel.

Bitch.

I play my cards close to my chest
Try to guess the hand I hold
And never will you see me cry
Or come close
to losing my shit

I'll be the queen
of my growing stable.
And kill you with kindness
You'll never see it coming

Is it me
or you.

Bitch.

7 of 9

George Petty, calendar pin-up, 1947
Originally uploaded by Gatochy.

Mmmm hmm, yeah, really. That sounds great - really, they did that -funny! Wow! Anyhing else? Aww that's sweet.

Me, shopping for lingerie, doing my nails, eating bon bons. Don't my legs look great. Cute shoes.

Oh, oops, call waiting. Gotta go.

Not An Addict - that's a lie

Breathe it in and breathe it out
And pass it on, it's almost out
We're so creative, so much more
We're high above but on the floor

It's not a habit, it's cool, I feel alive
If you don't have it you're on the other side

The deeper you stick it in your vein
The deeper the thoughts, there's no more pain
I'm in heaven, I'm a god
I'm everywhere, I feel so hot

It's not a habit, it's cool, I feel alive
If you don't have it you're on the other side
I'm not an addict (maybe that's a lie)

It's over now, I'm cold, alone
I'm just a person on my own
Nothing means a thing to me
(Nothing means a thing to me)

It's not a habit, it's cool, I feel alive
If you don't have it you're on the other side
I'm not an addict (maybe that's a lie)

Free me, leave me
Watch me as I'm going down
Free me, see me
Look at me, I'm falling and I'm falling.

An addict, me? Oh god or am I? I think I'm in Lithium and Naltrexone withdrawl but I hate how I feel on that shit. What to do Roxanna? Do I let the pink elephants trample through my head or smush them down with another dose??

Hysterically Blind Casino Royale

Over the weekend, Mr Ken,was telling me he had found some old funny letters of mine. I had to laugh. I can't believe he saved that shit. Man! I guess I have some old photos of Ken that I just stuffed on to flickr. We go out to dinner at a crazy Thai place - Ruam Mit Thai in St Paul. There were more people standing in the doorway then sitting down. It was a madhouse. But it was worth it. Ken asks if I want to accompany him to a poker game with his band friends. Earlier, I had seen the movie, "Casino Royale," and the beautiful woman pictured above is there to distract the other players. I asked Ken if I should wear a strappy dress - like the girl in the movie. He didn't understand. So I stayed in my flannel shirt and hiking boots. His band friends are fun and while I didn't play I seemed to be good luck for old Ken. All I was doing was joking around and being funny. I don't get poker. Not one bit.

At my therapist today, I told him I get nervous around people in social settings. I worry I'll offend them. And I've said some really dumb stuff. I joked with a lady who worked with alcoholics that she should have a glass of scotch. She laughed but I got reprimanded later for that comment. How the hell would I know she worked with alcoholics? Although a nurse I know got in a car accident - she comes roaring out of the car yelling at the other driver, "What the fuck is wrong with you - are you retarded??" And sadly the guy WAS retarded. Oh oops! At some point with my therapist I asked if I could say it was due to some disease or some excuse like that. And my therapist said I could claim hysterical blindness. It's not in the DSM-III-R for those in the know. It would be classified as a conversion disorder. I told my therapist I would get a medic alert bracelet that said I had hysterical blindness. He laughed. Now I really gotta go get one.

If I claim hysterical blindness at the next poker game,I wouldn't notice the other players staring at my strappy low cut dress. Or would they be staring at my medic alert bracelet. It would be a whole 'nother therapy session.

Wicked Game

The world was on fire and no one could save me but you.
It's strange what desire will make foolish people do.
I never dreamed that I'd meet somebody like you.
And I never dreamed that I knew somebody like you.

No, I don't want to fall in love. (This world is only gonna break your heart)
No, I don't want to fall in love. (This world is only gonna break your heart)
With you. With you. (This world is only gonna break your heart)

What a wicked game to play, to make me feel this way.
What a wicked thing to do, to let me dream of you.
What a wicked thing to say, you never felt this way.
What a wicked thing to do, to make me dream of you and,

I want to fall in love. (This world is only gonna break your heart)
No, I want to fall in love. (This world is only gonna break your heart)
With you.

The world was on fire and no one could save me but you.
It's strange what desire will make foolish people do.
I never dreamed that I'd love somebody like you.
And I never dreamed that I'd lose somebody like you no,

No, I want to fall in love. (This world is only gonna break your heart)
No, I want to fall in love. (This world is only gonna break your heart)
With you. (This world is only gonna break your heart)
With you. (This world is only gonna break your heart)
No, I... (This world is only gonna break your heart)
(This world is only gonna break your heart)

Nobody loves no one.