Girlfriend

Once I was his girlfriend.
I think it was an accident said one summer night.
Maybe he's regretted it ever since.
Who knows.

I wash the clothes he leaves behind
Make sure there's good liquor
And wood for the fireplace
But I'm not his girlfriend.

I buy food he likes
and work at his company.
Sometimes he takes me to his family's events
But I'm not his girlfriend.

He goofs up sometimes
He slips and forgets
and calls me his girlfriend.
I try to call him on it - but then he clams up.
I forget that I'm not his girlfriend.

He tells other women he's not interested in them
He doesn't want to date anyone
Or have any girlfriends.
But I'm not his girlfriend.

I've been waiting for four years
Watching him move from place to place.
Waiting for him to grow up
but mostly he's grown apart from me.
The girl who's not his girlfriend.

My friends tell me how fucking stupid I am.
Waiting, helping him out
Sleeping with him
Pretending and
Playing house sometimes.

I may never be his girlfriend again.
And that might be my choice.