Still Nobody Home

I got elastic bands keepin my shoes on.
Got those swollen hand blues.
I got thirteen channels of shit on the TV to choose from.
I've got electric light.
And I got second sight.
Got amazing powers of observation.
And that is how I know
When I try to get through
On the telephone to you
There'll be nobody home.

James is off camping. I was staring at the phone knowing he wouldn't call and starting humming this song. It's depressing but fitting. I miss you James.

I got wild staring eyes.
And I got a strong urge to fly.
But I got nowhere to fly to.
Ooooh, Babe when I pick up the phone

"Surprise, surprise, surprise..." (from Gomer Pyle show)
There's still nobody home.

Indulgence

... IMG_2419
Originally uploaded by *melkor*.

James and I went to the Basilica of St Mary in Minneapolis today (just look at the site name. Impressive!)

http://www.mary.org/

to pick up an art piece that was displayed in a religious art show. Luckily it was still displayed right there in the main basilica area so I could take a picture for his portfolio. To go in through the Sacristy you need a guide. We're in the basilica and James jokes around with the guide since his piece was in an art show - does he get a Plenary Indulgence - (which can be gained four ways: confession, communion, prayers for the pope, or charity. ) I always think you get an actual something - a pretty gold plaque - like shown when you get an indulgence. In the middle ages, the abuse and buying of indulgences got way out of hand. "The most well-known and debated question is the indulgence granted for building the new St. Peter's Basilica in Rome."

So later today, I drove James to Scott's house for their annual camping trip. And then after that - I drove Rob to work because he has a DUI and can't drive. So do I get an indulgence for doing all these good works? I always think if you have to ask - then no plaque, no coin. It's from the goodness of your heart. I did get some of the trail mix that Scott and James take camping. And it is giving me plaque on my teeth.

Black Baby Jesus

Black Baby Jesus
Originally uploaded by SandraDavis.

There you go Karen!

Playing doctor

There is so much bullshit involved in seeing a doctor these days.

Playing doctor ala Norman Rockwell - waltzing in the cute old fashioned office without an appointment, seeing a compassionate doctor that listens to you, getting the right tests and you're cured. All in one day. Roll credits.

Or playing doctor these days. Having pain, waiting months for an appointment. Busy doctors that imply that you're wasting their time. The bullshit of getting referrals, and finding a clinic that takes your insurance.

Playing doctor - ha! Not if I have to go through all the bullshit. No thanks.

Sprinkler toy

James and I were out yesterday buying him a planer he found on Craigslist. We're at this guy's house and he has all sorts of cool shit laying around - an old coffee can with a great logo, an old drill press and a little John Deere tractor thing. See the picture. It looks like kid's toy. I tell him my mom will buy weird antiques for my dad and the gift is making my dad guess what it is. The old tractor looks like a sprinkler. The dude tells me it is. It travels all over the yard on the hose. I am incredulous. No fucking way! I think maybe some antique store might have that. I love it. I have new grass seed and I'd love to see the little tractor drive around my yard and water the grass. I think I type John Deer sprinkler in the Google. Holy shit - they sell them at Ace Hardware. I call my local Ace and they have two kinds. I jump in the car. And there's a red Ace version and the John Deere tractor one. Tonight, James helped me set them both up and we watched them traverse my backyard and water the grass. The neighbors were equally excited. Kirk, the little neighbor boy, kept running from my front yard, to my back yard. He bet the red Ace one was faster. What do you know - red is always faster!

All from some dude on Craigslist. I didn't even know those things existed - until yesterday. What fun!

The Apple Dumpling Gang

It is National Apple Dumpling day. Long long ago, when I was wee thing. The Wilmette movie theater - my neighborhood theater - advertised kiddie matinees. We had seen one good movie there and I was certain it was the Apple Dumpling Gang. Nope. When it started I remembered that the GOOD movie was HR Puffnstuff. Apple Dumpling was insipid. And we suffered through it. And I've always remembered since that day - it was the bad one.

Chocolate, cheese and wine

wine lovers cake
Originally uploaded by tesorocookies.

I saw my therapist yesterday. She kills me - and I mean in a good way. She cracks me up. My current meds might be causing some stomach upset so we decided to change them. I have a friend on an MAOI type drug and there's alot of foods you can't eat while on an MAOI. I said to my therapist "Do not put me on an MAOI" and she said, "Oh honey, you NEED red wine, chocolate and cheese. I would never do that to you." Adorable. And a license to eat drink and be merry.

Doesn't that chocolate, cream cheese cake say it all. Maybe I'll send it to my therapist.

Cut the dickens out of my finger

I was actually looking for Tim Meadows doing his Ladies Man sketch. Clips from the Ladies Man movie are around - but I want the SNL stuff. I found an SNL video library and the Julie Child clip still makes me laugh. It reminds me of watching bad Saturday night TV with Dana, from Love Boat, Fantasy Island and SNL. I can remember repeating this show over and over. And stupidly, last weekend, I did cut the dickens out of my finger and it still hurts. But only when I laugh.

Toys in the Attic

Toys in the Attic
Originally uploaded by ddnlj.

Which is a funny name for a song because at my parents house, I do have my whole collection of childhood toys - in the attic. It's a hideous mess. And some in the secret room,too. The lever to open the secret room door is well a secret and nearly impossible to find. This is not my picture - but a great shot of what it may look like. Or Toys in the Attic by Pink Floyd is a depressing song about being crazy

Crazy.
Toys in the attic, I am crazy.
Truly gone fishing.
They must have taken my marbles away.
(crazy. toys in the attic, he is crazy.)

Crazy.
Over the rainbow, I am crazy.
Bars in the window.
There must have been a door there in the wall.
For when I came in. . .
(crazy. over the rainbow, he is crazy.)

Sometimes you worry no one NO ONE is listening to you and everyone thinks you're crazy. If feels like you're wasting their time. Then one magical day, you finally find someone who listens. Really listens. And maybe there's an answer. Just because they listened. Then it's time to clean out the attic and maybe the basement as well.

Institutionalized

Monday, Monday.

Days go by

I yelled at the sky
Made an Indian cry

And the days go by

You are still a whisper on my lips
A feeling at my fingertips
That's pulling at my skin

You leave me when I'm at my worst
Feeling as if I've been cursed
Bitter cold within

Days go by and still I think of you
Days when I couldn't live my life without you
Days go by and still I think of you
Days when I couldn't live my life without you
Without you
Without you

Lawn Doctor

My lawn looks like crap. This was a long hot summer and I didn't water it. Oops! When I moved in, twelve years ago, the people who owned the house before me told me that they had tried seeding and putting in sod. And had no luck. I was told to get my soil tested at the University of MN. I've kept meaning to. Yes for twelve years. I had my back yard redone two years ago (because it looked like crap) and it's all dead again. At the State Fair there was a Master Gardener booth - stump the gardener with you questions. I tell them my lawn it crap and they tell me to get my soil tested. Geez, the soil lab is so hideously far from my house (three miles.) So I finally did it. I downloaded all the forms and went digging in the yard. And I paid for three tests - the standard, salts and lead. I joked with the lady that if my lawn was so terrible would they call, tell me to sit down and that my lawn was nearly dead and it was best to put it out of it's misery. And to asphalt the whole thing. I made her laugh. What if I do have the most diseased lawn and I do get the call? I hope it's Calvin who make the call and he'll have to get the saw. And the asphalt!

Sabotage

I was driving past downtown St Paul and this song came on the radio. With the RNC in town, nearly every exit near downtown is closed. There've been angry protesters, urine throwing and cross dressing. Listen all y'all it's sabotage. By everyone.

Litter is a slap in America's face

Litter is a slap in America's face
Originally uploaded by Debora Drower.

I was at the fair today. Yes, the now closed Minnesota State Fair. No food, no people, no rides. But I needed to shoot some stuff. And it was great - because one thing I wanted to shoot had some obstructions a few days ago - and now they're gone. No crowds to block the French Fry stand, or to block the shot at Steichen's. And a whole empty parking lot of these crazy garbage cans -all 4 flavors. This is my all time favorite. "A slap in America's face". So I reshot them with the digital camera. I filled up my cards, said my goodbyes to the fair and went home. It's really closed and I'll have to wait until next year. The garbage can is empty along with my heart. Good night fair.

Good bye State Fair

In usual fashion, the fair ends and autumn arrives. No lie. I have gone to the state fair on a sticky humid day and wanted only cold foods and then walked home in the rain while a cold front moves in and had soup for dinner. Yesterday, Labor day, it was the last day of the fair - sticky humid. Yucky. And today, the cold front and the rain has moved in. Weird. I am in withdrawal. No more mini donuts or cheese curds or neon midway rides.

Until next year.

Slice and Dice

Slice and Dice
Originally uploaded by Debora Drower.

James has some college friends who all used to play those nerdy games like D&D and Magic the Gathering. Not my cup of tea. Me - it's MST3K. It was one of these nerds birthday.James stops by his favorite magic store, Eagle Magic, and buys some dice. I decide to make a Magic the Gathering birthday card to go along with the dice - and I find an actual card called Slice and Dice. So I find the Magic the Gathering font and symbols and write my own copy. The best part was the party was this hilarious girl, Amanda, with no prompting asks something like, "What is this - a Magic the Gathering party?" And there's the lead in for the present. Priceless. Luckily there was much less chatter about World of Warcraft and their nerdy games but more goofing around with an iPhone - much cooler. Yet Al, (a Phil Collins look alike) could not hang up (I'd keep yelling at him "hang up") with the texting and leaving voice mails. To another member of the party. Endlessly. You give them a cooler toy and DOES become a Magic the Gathering party. Oh well.

State Fair

State Fair Shadow Box
Originally uploaded by Debora Drower.

My state fair. I love you. I love the food, the garbage cans, the people, the smells, the neon, the signs, the rides. I love the guys hawking their products - sometimes with decade old spiels. I've heard them all. I own brooms and mops and knife sharpeners purchased from the fair just so I have little reminders the other 355 days of the year. My shadow box only covers so much. I love hearing the fireworks (sorry Sass) every night. I only thing I don't love is that it heralds the end of summer.

Once I went to the fair, it was hot and sticky. A storm came up and as I walked the mile home, it got colder and grayer. By evening - it was 50º and I was eating soup to stay warm.

Iocane Powder

In the movie "Princess Bride" (for me it's the book - NOT the movie)

Vizzini: You only think I guessed wrong! That's what's so funny! I switched glasses when your back was turned! Ha ha! You fool! You fell victim to one of the classic blunders! The most famous is never get involved in a land war in Asia, but only slightly less well-known is this: never go in against a Sicilian when death is on the line! Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha! Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha! Ha ha ha...

Vizzini: [Vizzini stops suddenly, and falls dead to the right]

Buttercup: And to think, all that time it was your cup that was poisoned.

Man in Black: They were both poisoned. I spent the last few years building up an immunity to iocane powder.

When I bought this rum I swore it WAS Iocane. I still think it is. And if you drink enough of it - you do build up an immunity - to pretty much any liquor.

Amy and Todd 8/22/08

Amy and Todd
Originally uploaded by Debora Drower.

I love this picture of you guys. Off on one of your adventures. I have no idea who took it.

I keep the photo in my address book in case I want to call you and tell you of the funny thing I saw at a store. Or that I have gossip. I think about how long it's been since I talked to you. Then I remember. That the photo was in the funeral program five years ago. Everyone thought I was nuts saying, "It's a joke, right?" "They'll pop up and say "Surprise!" You guys didn't pop up. It was real. Both of you in a horrible plane crash.

I will toast you kids with ice cream and Captain and Coke. And wish you were with me. I miss you tons, love, Debora

Nurse Sass

Sass on the floor
Originally uploaded by Debora Drower.

My Sassala, was the best nurse. I loved that when I would get out the digital thermometer, she'd growl at every beep. But each growl would get softer. Beep. Grrrr. Then she got used to it. Damn that was cute. When you'd take a sick day, get a bunch of DVDs and get all comfy on the couch by the tv. She'd get on the floor right by you. Every few hours she'd get up and dead check you. She'd make you pet her by putting her nose under your hand. The response to that was, "Hi honey, I'm not dead. Yet." If someone was worrying about you being alone, at home and on NyQuil - you know Nurse Sass was there to dead check you. That cold wet nose could wake you from a double dose of the Quil.

I was out sick yesterday and I tried to will my nurse there with me. I tried to imagine her wet nose. And how she'd stand up on the frame of the couch and bark as other dogs dared to walk by the house. I only got a faint glimmer and a few dog hairs in the wuss blanket. But no actual real live dog.

Mumph.